Arsene is a Very, Very, Naughty Boy

The Arsenal AGM was held this Thursday just gone, and Arsene surprised even some of his fiercest critics by fielding all questions hurled at him.  The normal format at the AGM is for attendees to submit questions, in advance, for Board members to answer. Except our potential future owner surly Silent Stan, he apparently just sat looking sullen and said bugger all. Nice!  

Arsene had a rough ride last year at the AGM, and was expected to provide only ready-made answers this year, but not a bit of it. He is a knowledgeable, decent man and treats all questioners with candour and humour, sometimes to his own detriment.

For instance, earlier in the week, Arsene had admitted, at his regular press conference, that he had sometimes been economical with the truth.  Wow, can’t you just hear the media and opposition fans sharpening their pens, or in this digital age, making sure Microsoft Word is set to automatically check their spelling and their grammar!
Arsene has recently admitted to telling little white lies, to questions asked by the press boys! Oh my goodness, that’s appalling, the “Meedja” would never, ever tell porkies. They are as pure as the driven snow, and that goes without saying. Yeah, right!

A News of the World reporter saw half a dozen kids standing in a circle with a dog on a string. Worried they intended to hurt the dog, he asked them what they were going to do with it. “Oh, he’s a stray and we all want to keep him, so we are going to have a competition, and the one who can tell the biggest lie, gets to keep him”. Horrified, the reporter said, “Don’t you know it’s wrong to lie. When I was your age I never told a lie.” There was a minute’s silence, until the youngest boy said, “Alright, give him the dog”.

Out of the mouths of the innocents ………..

Arsene said he always consulted with the player concerned, before telling the media the agreed story. So, do his fibs come into the usual category, with which we are all familiar? You know; “Don’t worry……. I’m sterile” or “Of course I love you” or “She means nothing to me”. Or are they something more serious?

So what could be more serious you ask? Well how about something like this.

Young Johnny was taken to school by his dad, who told his new teacher he was worried about his son’s lying and gambling. When he returned in the afternoon to pick Johnny up, he asked the teacher how things had gone. The teacher said, “I think I have broken his gambling habit”, “How did you do that?” asked the dad. “Johnny bet me £2 that I had a mole on my bum”, said the teacher, “so I pulled down my knickers and won the bet by showing him I did not. He then said he would never gamble again”. “Damn”, said the dad, “the lying sod bet me £50 this morning that he would see his teacher’s bum, before I picked him up from school today”.
Darn it, I think I just mislead you, but was it important? No, I don’t think any harm was done. And that’s the point. If a lie is spoken to deceive for gain, or to harm someone, that is serious, but I doubt that any fib perpetrated by Arsene falls into this category. He clearly said what he did to protect the player, and not for any wicked purpose.

So what would I classify as “wicked”? That, of course, is very subjective, as one person’s wicked is another person’s funny. What do you think of the following?

A bus filled with politicians was taking a remote country road, on its way to the next political venue, when the driver became distracted and crashed the bus into a ditch, turning it over.
A farmer rushed over to the scene and because of the remote location, decided to bury all the bodies.
The next day the police showed up and questioned the farmer. “So you decided to bury all the politicians? Were they all dead?”. “Well” said the farmer “some of them said they weren’t, but you know how politicians lie!”

If you have stayed with me up to here, you are probably aware by now, I don’t have much time for the stupid feeding frenzy, encouraged by certain journalists, whenever Arsene Wenger opens his mouth.

So I leave you with this thought;

Sport of choice; for Fleet Street maintenance workers. Basketball
Sport of choice; for Fleet Street Office Cleaners. Rugby
Sport of choice; for Fleet Street Secretaries and Office Workers. Volley Ball
Sport of choice; for Fleet Street Receptionists. Cricket
Sport of choice; for People who hate Arsene. Golf
Sport of choice; for Fleet Street Journalists. Table Tennis

The moral of this is that Journalists play with the smallest balls.

Written by Red Arse

0 0 votes
Article Rating
166 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
charybdis1966
charybdis1966
15 years ago

Hi RedA/Rico – the moral of the story is also ”Journalists aren’t there to tell us the news, they are there to sell papers” – but yes, they are all just a bunch of pompous, hypocritical douche buckets.

K-TR7
K-TR7
15 years ago

Morning all.Hilarious post RA.remember sky claiming rooney is better than messi…well he isn’t even in the 23 man list of FIFA Ballon d’Or!congrats to cesc for making it.only gyan and drogba in the PL made it while laliga have 11 players.

keeming
keeming
15 years ago

I believe you have a lot of time on your hands

charybdis1966
charybdis1966
15 years ago

Yes KTR7 – but what these idiots who assemble the nominations forget is that the England squad play with passion, they get stuck in and of course they never dive.
Villa, pah what about Crouch?
Iniesta, pah, rather Gareth Barry.
Maicon, pah, the toilet-seat thief Johnson is light years ahead.

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Keeming,

I apologise for the delay in responding to you.

Technically, you are incorrect, I only have the time on my wrist. And now I have no more time for you.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Wao RA,

Was someone surprised no English player made the list?

I would have stopped following football if any of them made the list. 😐

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Yeahp you are right WATH!

Do they even care ?

If they had gone far, maybe Ashley Cole would have made the list (although i hate to say it)but even he couldn’t prevent those goals from going in.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Am Cool Rico,

If Walcott can improve on his end product he will because he brings something different to football.

Capello was very clueless and if he actually dropped him because Rooney didn’t feel comfortable with him, then i am not surprised he said that Rooney could be dropped if he doesn’t play well.

Rooney has substituted his untouchability for money.
Defoe and Co will be happy with Capello’s request this morning.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Rooney has substituted his untouchability for money.
Defoe and Co will be happy with Capello’s statement this morning.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Shrek! nice one Rico

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Even Fergie will start benching him now.

How nice if Evra refuse to sign and everybody starts asking for more money in Man Utd (i think it will happen.)

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Hi SD 🙂 Is “wao” Dutch?

WATH, thank you so much for being so considerate of my sensitivities! Actually, I was being ironic, (you know sardonic humour?)but, of course, I bow to your intimate knowledge of old women. Very enlightening, I am sure. 🙂

You might want to try Googling to find someone who could give a stuff what Keeming thinks. ‘Fraid I can’t help. 🙂

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Things don’t look too good for Shrek on the marriage front. All the papers are carrying stories of collossal bust ups at the Sheikh al Buraj, between him and Colleen.

All that money and no happiness!

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

I expect Arsene will put out a “first” eleven tomorrow night, but I hope JET and Chezzer get a run out.

I’m pretty sure Theo and Bendy will play as they need match fitness.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Red Arse, Wao is WAO like WAO! you like Wao that was deep stuff. WAO. (its not Dutch) 🙂

On the papers stories about Rooney, i wouldn’t reckon with stories like that.

Sun newspaper was just looking for something to write.
Couples fight and in Rooney’s case he just hurt his wife not long ago.

Even though this WAGs seems to be in it only for the money, they unfortunately have some little feelings so they get hurt when the husband cheats.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Well i am not a fan of Cheryl C because she cant sing at all and i hate being manipulated and feed by the media.(Just me)

But out of the WAGS , she has impressed me as well.

Terrys wife has being unbelievable because in less than 2weeks, she was glemming with smiles from Dubai showing off new diamonds etc.

Even if Terry had done it with her sister, she will still gladly stick with the terry in less than 2weeks.

I think Rooney tried to follow Terry’s footseps but it is not working 🙂
Sorry Rooney- she has ASDA contracts out of many , TV shows, therefore you will try more than using Terry’s moves.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

I will not like to go into Cheryl Cole singing ability really but i know ladies just love her.(Understandable).
But talking about vocals, she cant hold her own .Try and put her in thesame room with Beverly Knight, Sherly Bersy or Duffy (all british)There is a reason she wasn’t the lead vocalist in Girls Aloud.

Evra asking for more money 🙂 the Americans will be broke soon. 🙂
Who will buy a club rated at arround £800Million ?

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Fletcher is next,

Berbatov might even try his luck.

Oh i forgot Ferdinand but he is crocked now.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Fergie wants Reina : he just think he can get anyone he wants.
Those days are gone; Rooney has taken that away from them, they are no longer invincible.

Ronaldo reading Rooney’s stories last week must have being dumb founded and thought he must be on drugs or something 😉

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

morning all. rather offbeat post, ra, but it gets your point regarding the media across quite nicely…

big win last night, but i came away not entirely satisfied. we won despite five turnovers, allowing a td on a return, and stopped playing the last five minutes, allowing dallas to make the score hugely flattering to them. on the other hand, we knocked another qb (romo) out, and (for all intents and purposes) ended their season. we have a bye this week, and then a difficult trip to seattle. it just figures that the giants play in seattle the season before i move there, and the season after i leave: so i get to miss them. it would have been nice to see them play up there.

couglin not entirely happy either. his mantra continues to be turnovers and penalties lose games. we got away with it last night, primarily because we moved the ball at will. but unless we cut these things out, it will cost us dearly down the road.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Basically Fergie is F*&^*D

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

sorry folks – that was directed towards ra, about last night’s nfl game in dallas. in addition to supporting arsenal, we are both ny giants fans, and i wanted his thoughts on their big win last night. arsenal up at st james tomorrow – i don’t think we will see eli manning suiting up for either team!

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

no, in fact i would call them polar opposites.

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

(bernard) manning was a huge man city supporter, wasn’t he? i am not sure which team eli supports…

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Ok thats enough, can we talk about tomorrow’s game?

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Miami Heats and Chicago Bulls 🙂

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Hi Oliver,

Thanks for your comment re the article. 🙂

Again, I only saw brief highlights of the game on ESPN, but did not know the final score at the time.

The Cowboys forcing five t/o’s and scoring on a punt would usually expect to have won such a game, having gone 20:7 up.
That they lost and are pretty much out of the play offs is a credit to the Giants. Mike Boley seems to have been immense. Some linebacker in my opinion. 🙂

Manning too was brilliant as far as I could see, and throwing 2 touchdowns in the 2nd quarter pretty much sewed the game up for us.

Got to go out now, just popped in for a minute to make sure WATH is alright. We look out for each other, or so he thinks, the poor old thing! 🙂

Later.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Sorry WATH , don’t have the inside info. you know Wenger , he will probably surprised us again with the selection.(ask Harry Redknap)

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Is the CC on Sky or BBC ?

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Just saw your comment Rico.

I will be back later, although my article has not generated much interest it seems, so my absence is no great loss! 🙂

One issue I was going to mention is the number of comments that Cesc’s supposed “imaginery” yellow card gesture has generated, after he was fouled for the umpteenth time. Good on you Cesc, is my reaction. What about you? 🙂

Really later, now. 🙂

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

hi ra – we did more than enough to win, but with all the mistakes and ultra-soft defense at the end, we could have easily lost. the mistakes are fixable – we just have to cut them out.

part of it is i think eli throws too many passes – 35 last night. his receivers made plenty of big plays for him, but the first two int’s also came from passes that bounced of (smith and nicks) hands. i would say run the ball more – but bradshaw and jacobs combined for over 200 yards…and each of them fumbled once.

a big win, but plenty of mistakes along the way, and room for improvement.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

thanks Rico.

Red Arse , you wrote a piece not an article.
Was a good read but there was no points made to generate views.

Like i said good piece and liked the way you put the narratives together.

Promise that you wouldn’t leave us to start a writing carrier that could generate Thousands for you.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Me too Rico but maybe i might watch Westbrom(Plunkers)

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Thanks for the invitation Rico, i will be glad to write a post.
So many good write ups on this blog that it will be a challenge but i just let me know what to do to write a post.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Ok Rico.

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Back again for five. 🙂 My other computer is churning out some quite tricky schedules so I have to keep checking and amending. Need to keep the wolf from the doorstep. 🙂

Thanks for your comments earlier SD. I know what you mean about there being no points to discuss. Rico will tell you that I am a reluctant scribe, and would not choose to write except to help her out occasionally.

You have identified my weakness tho’. I am just not familiar with the blog world terminology. 🙂

“A piece”, “a post”, “an article”, as we speak, all of these terms/descriptions have been used, today, on other sites to describe the same thing.

I don’t care what it’s called really but there is no overall uniformity in blogland, altho’ what I love about the English language is that we have so many words for the same or similar things.

Our language derives from old Germanic, (Anglo Saxon), with both Latin (French) and Indo-European roots. Beautiful! 🙂

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Rico Pinocchio,

Has your snitch just grown longer? 🙂

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

arsene has indicated that szczesny, koscielny will start tomorrow evening, and that theo, bendnter, and vela will all be involved. i am fine with szczesny and kos starting, and i hope vela can at least get some meaningful minutes – i think it is fast becoming now or never for him.

hopefully the rest of the squad will be strong. arsene has indicated that jet, eastmond and lansbury will be in the squad, so hopefully the remainder will be first teamers. in many ways, this figures to be a tougher match than west ham on the weekend – although we cannot afford to take the latter lightly and lose momentum.

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

as long as we have a good mix, i will be happy. i hope to never again see the days where we fielded a youth team and a couple of fringe experienced players. that set us up for failure, and i don’t think those losing experiences were worth going out of the cups. arsene has publicly said that we will try to win every competition, and tomorrow’s squad should reflect that. the league cup is eminently winnable this season, so we need to play like we will be the ones to win it.

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

Well, I reckon all managers lie about/for their players. It’s part of the job description. No harm, no foul, I guess. But the assertion that Almunia is good… That can’t be an innocuous one. 🙂

Hola, rico and oliver. rico, the stains just never stop, do they?? Ugh. oliver, can’t wait for tomorrow. I hope Wenger’s mishmashy line-ups are a thing of the past. We have to start winning even these sippy cups.

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

hi agag…it seems rico and i completely agree with you. we should use these competitions as an opportunity to further the development of our best youth players who are ready, by surrounding them with a first-team spine. that gives us the best chance of success, while serving the purpose of resting a few first-teamers, giving some squad members much-needed match action, and furthering the development of the younger players who are ready. the key is not stacking the side with young players who are not ready, as we have done in the past. yesterday’s model was a template for failure. this new model should be geared towards winning the cup, with the collateral benefits i mentioned earlier. anything else is not doing right by the club and supporters.

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

I promised myself, I’d be kinder to Almunia… And yet… 🙂

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

rico, cesc is playing with an edge that our team has lacked for several years. i think nasri has a similar edge, and i hope it spreads throughout the squad. we badly need a “don’t %$&@ with us” attitude, especially against the chelseas and man uniteds.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

I hope so too Rico , because Oliver’s list seems to have many of the young ones and looking like it will be walcott and Bendtner on the bench as senior players.

Newcastle are not a small fry , i will suggest Wenger should put Rosicki in the mix with Arshavin on the bench , chamarkh rested, Ebue on the right, Clichy on the bench in case Gibbs get injured(is he playing?)

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

Completely agree, oliver. While these cups are excellent platforms to test our young ‘uns on the big stage; it can’t be good for the team’s morale to squander yet another chance at silverware. That’s an extravagance we cn i-ll aford. It’s not even as if we have many chances, why throw away a realistic one??

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

i agree, sd. i think rosicky and eboue are among those who will feature. i think arshavin is a player who can use a rest, as rosicky and vela may both feature. gibbs definitely to start, and i imagine diaby will figure as well.

i also agree that we need to take newcastle seriously. even though he is a spuddie, i still have a lot of time for chris hougton, and will be happy to see him succeed at newcastle, so long as it is not at arsenal’s expense. don’t forget that we are facing newcastle tomorrow because they won at stamford bridge in the previous round. so they need to be treated with respect, and i expect arsene’s team selection to show this.

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

not only that, agag, but i do not think the importance of this young, home-grown squad finally winning a trophy. a domestic cup is just as good as the league title, for giving them the taste of winning, and the confidence to do it again.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

when you win the world cup and you were involved in the winning pass then you play with an edge in the league.

That is why he is world class and Rooney is not, the media has his own disillusioned idea but he didn’t make the FIFA list so there you go.

Fabregas is the best midfielder in the premier league right now.

K-TR7
K-TR7
15 years ago

Afternoon all.if you thought clichy has a poor cross…wayne bridge has put 49 crosses this season with none of them finding his teammate.

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

rico, that is similar to what i thought, except that i think eboue may be involved, probably at sagna’s expense. i think eastmond will figure at some point as well, depending upon how the match unfolds.

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

oliver, we’re a loooong way yet from lifting the trophy, but this just could be our year. No place for complacence now. I wish the thirst for titles that all our players have spoken of at one point or another manifests in action tomorrow, oliver.

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

we’ll see what happens, agag. nothing is guaranteed, but the path to this particular trophy is clearer than it was a round ago. it is time for these players to show more than potential and coming close in competitions. legacies are defined by trophies, and this arsenal side does not yet have a legacy. now is time to start.

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

rico, to address your earlier, the stains are going down; it won’t be long now, Madrid will be winning every other trophy… 🙂

SD, Cesc is the best MF in the prem; and certainly in the top 5 the world over. Good for us, he’s just 23. Now, if only he were to stay put…

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

KT, I am certain you don’t mean me re; Clichy. 🙂 🙂

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

rico, yes PDE is priceless. 😳

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Not a bad team Rico.

Oliver, you go and wash your mouth out! Don’t mention Eastmond and Arsenal in the same breath.

Having stood in cold, wet misery, at Barnett, watching Eastmond in the youth teams for 2 or 3 years, I simply cannot get my head around the fact he is still at the club, while other better players have been released!

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

Wenger will play ebue

Rico : I am Wenger 😉 this is my selection

Chesney
ebue Kos Djurou Gibbs

Denilson,Fabregas,Daiby

Walcott JET?Bendtner Vela

Pat Rice can chose the subs 🙂

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

Clichy was NOT terrible on Sunday, rico. Haha. I shall limit myself to an appraisal only of our most recent performance…

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

actually, i don’t have that big a problem with eastmond. regardless of what either of us feel, arsene still rates him and has stated he (eastmond) will be in the squad tomorrow. i think he will be on the pitch at some point tomorrow night, so here is hoping he can make the most of it – and that the whole team makes the most of the opportunity we have in front of us.

SD-London
SD-London
15 years ago

bye

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

He’s PDE when I’m all 😳 . Generally, he makes me 🙂 🙂 🙂 . But talk of the stains only means 😡 .

rico, but Valencia lost its two starriest stars. Did Mata stay put? I don’t mind Hercules winning… Haha.

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

sd, it is interesting that you put cesc in the side. i would think that he would be rested, but now i remember that cesc is only recently back from injury and jack is suspended. if cesc needs a breather, it is logical to rest him in a situation where jack can come in…

agirlagunner
agirlagunner
15 years ago

Goodbye, SD.

K-TR7
K-TR7
15 years ago

I have never been convinced by eastmond.

oliver
oliver
15 years ago

another thing to remember is that newcastle have a weekend derby against the mackems coming up – those tyne-wear derbies are always the biggest matches for those two sides. so regardless of what hughton or any of the players say, that will be the larger priority. a strong, balanced arsenal squad should be able to make the most of that as well.

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

You are the man KT. 🙂

I have felt like a voice in the wilderness, but then if everyone had seen what I have seen at Barnett, there would be no dispute!

I am genuinely flabbergasted and don’t understand it.

Rico, you say he has got better this season. I have not been to any reserve team games this year, except one, so I rely on Young Guns/Jeorge Bird reports, and they don’t seem to be too impressed either.

Anyway, that is my last word on Eastmond! 🙂

K-TR7
K-TR7
15 years ago

RA I have never understood all the fuss about him.JET on the other hand will go as far as his attitude.

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Arsene was talking about JET on ATVO a little while ago, and I have never before heard such high praise given to a player by Arsene.

Now JET has always been a brilliant player for all the youth teams. Absolute class and in many ways I think he is just as good as, if not better than, Jack.

Different type of players, of course, but if he can keep his weight under control and sharpen up physically, you just watch him go. If he fails at Arsenal (unlikely) then I think the Giants should get him, Oliver! 🙂

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

You are right to come to your own conclusions, Rico. In fact, I hope I am wrong, just not holding my breath.

K-TR7
K-TR7
15 years ago

Vela should regroup since if he does not perform the likes of wellington and JET will surpass him.

K-TR7
K-TR7
15 years ago

I see the Ballon d’Or being won by iniesta or sneijder.hopefully next year we’ll have a couple more of our own in that shortlist.

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Rico,

I’m afraid we disagree again. From what I have seen, Sunu, Vela and especially Freeman are not going to make it at Arsenal, far be it from surpassing JET.

Freeman, while on loan, has hardly played because he is so poor. Vela has obviously not been given enough chances and I expect him to be on his way soon.

Sunu is working his ticket and wants to go back to France.

KT, Iniesta for me, on his performances last year, altho’ he has not been so good this season, so far.

K-TR7
K-TR7
15 years ago

RA have you watched iniesta this season?he is barca’s best player at the moment, even messi is not close to him at the moment.

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Rico,

Freeman played 56 mins for Yeovil in their 2:0 loss, before getting the hook. Even so, he is rubbish. Sorry.

Young guns recently said Sunu was unhappy and wanted to leave. Again, like Freeman he is rubbish. (Rubbish by Arsenal standards, of course).

KT, I generally watch RM and Barca on Saturday nights. Don’t misunderstand me, I have already said Iniesta is the man for me, I am simply voicing an opinion, that i don’t feel he (or Barca) are playing as well as last season).

Well, that’s all from me folks, see you all tomorrow! 🙂

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Sorry, Rico,

Just checked Young Guns, and I loaded an old file. My Yeovil comment was rubbish. (rubbish meaning crap by any standards, in my case!) 🙂

Tomorrow, oh knowledgeable one. (he is still rubbish!) 🙂

Red Arse
Red Arse
15 years ago

Rico,

I have just re-loaded Young Guns and it appears I was right first time. He did play for Yeovil, nursing his broken leg presumably! 🙂

Definitely Bye now!

T-buzz
T-buzz
15 years ago

Morning!
Little Pea is proving to be hot cake at the moment, his style of play reminds me of a young Michael Owen