Morning all…
I’ll kick off with a story from The Daily Express – they suggest we are ready to table an offer of £17 million for Paul Pogba. Not sure how much truth is in that, or if indeed he’d be worth that much but it was pretty clear that Fergie was really cheesed off when the player got one over him…..
The Daily Mirror suggest Wenger is keen to sign Matthias Ginter, a 19-year-old defensive midfielder, from German top-flight side Freiburg in a deal worth £5m!
Other news from yesterday was of course, all about the exits. Three more were confirmed to be leaving us for free. One failed Russian whippet, a young Brazilian donkey and of course, an old French cart horse. None of whom will be missed!
On to todays post.
As the days grow longer, the Sun warms the earth and the seasons change, we find ourselves once again in the English Summertime. Deep underground all sorts of slimy creatures are looking to make their way to the surface so they can feast on the bounty that this time of year provides. Creepy-crawlies, some with multitudinous legs and some, called Jose, that make their way by squirming side to side on their elongated bellies are all competing for sustenance. Nematodes, Centipedes, Beetles, Slugs and all manner of insect life are active at this time of year. All looking to scavenge what they can from their surroundings.
But, as it is also the close-season for football, there is plenty of fodder for them to get their digestive systems around. During the Summer months many of them take up work as Sports journalists or creators of a certain breed of footballing blog designed to outrage fans with inflammatory headlines that tempt us to click their link. Then we can read articles that are ineptly written and completely fabricated. Having no sense of personal integrity whatsoever means that they can write whatever they want because, as Autumn approaches, they will be able to sink beneath the earth once more to engorge themselves on dead vegetable matter and detritus left over from an abundant summer and shit where they sleep.
Their main aim during their time above ground of course is to sell advertising. Open their site and you immediately register a click and some manufacturer of tickling sheathes, sex-aids, breast-enhancement charlatans or a company specialising in Penis Enlargement procedures just might be in line for a phone call from you, seeking their help to end your feelings of insecurity and inadequacy. So, in effect, the more outrageous the headline the more likely we are to click it. Whether this be out of general, misguided stupidity or outrage, it matters not to them, as long as we click it.
The newspapers are just as guilty and I am sure that when we read a headline on the back of The Sun to the effect that yet another one of our players has issued a “warning” to the club that they intend to leave if World-Class players are not signed immediately, we have a pretty good idea of whose name will be appear as the author of that sad little piece of nastiness.
If Laurent Koscielny, for instance, gives an interview where he says he is happy at the club and hopes they can win something but neglects to say that they might have won something had he not made a stupid error a couple of years ago at Wembley, then we can all get where he is coming from.
After a very good half a season, a player becomes fair game to the inebriated hacks of Fleet Street. He becomes someone that they can use to slap the paying fans around the face with, like a rotting Haddock, or even a decrepit piece of Rock Salmon. It means that they can remain at the bar and pour warm beer down their necks and drop half-chewed bits of a Ploughman’s Lunch, mixed with Nicotine-stained saliva, down their drip-dry nylon shirts where it will eventually form a crust before falling off of their copious beer guts and nestling somewhere in the creases of their encrusted trousers and yellow-stained underpants.
It means that they won’t actually have to pick up the phone or travel too far from the bar to conduct a sensible interview. No, they can simply click on the Internet and as they belch a dense cloud of poisonous gas while simultaneously farting the remains of last night’s take away curry into the face of a minion, they can gaze through the numerous sites designed to denigrate our football club and take their pick rather like a sewer rat might sample many piles of human excrement before getting tucked into the one that takes his fancy.
“Arsenal Target Rejects Move” they will write before explaining that a player from the Middle East that nobody has ever heard of and who may or may not even exist, has decided to shun Arsenal to stay at a club that plays in the 10th division of Algerian football. “Moyes Swoops To Buy Fabregas” will probably irritate the Arsenal fans won’t it?
Ok then, let’s make it “Moyes Close To Grabbing Cesc From Under Miserly Wenger’s Nose”. Oh yes, that adds a degree of personalisation to it that will infuriate Gooners everywhere. What about “Wilshere To Walk Away From Arsenal After Claiming Club Has No Ambition” , now that is a good ‘un. We could even throw in that the wonderful, sensational and handsome, if vertically challenged, Jose Mourinho is a long-term admirer couldn’t we.? And Jose always gets what he wants doesn’t he?
He is, after all, The Special One.
Perhaps we tend to click those links that we hope have some truth to them. “Gervinho On The Way Out Of Arsenal” might well tempt my right digit I must admit.
So it goes on, as tripe and lies are layered upon innuendo and nonsensical rumour. “Cesc Could Return To Arsenal” finds itself next to “Cesc Going Nowhere”. And all the time, the pressure builds. Someone, somewhere has decided that this is the Summer when everything changes at Arsenal. The wonderful news spreads like wildfire through the blogging community and the expectation and anticipation is ramped up.
The Appendage Report and their endless stream of teenage American wannabe sports writers from Harvard or UCLA hurriedly regurgitate “Ten Players That Arsenal Must Sign This Summer”and Theodore L. Aspergo Junior counters with “Ten Players That Arsenal Must Avoid Signing This Summer”.
Koscielney is leaving and staying, Sagna is on his way to the tempting fortunes available at PSG while simultaneously negotiating a new contract to stay at Arsenal. Jovetic is in the bag but the insufferably miniature Mourinho sees him as a vital cog in the grinding wheel that will soon become Chelsea.
Ah, Jose. What can you say about this man except there is no nematode beneath whose belly he could not squirm. The only thing we can predict with absolute certainly is that his return will herald widespread feelings of revulsion and that no ploy that appeals to his sense of self-aggrandisement, regardless of how despicable and low, will be beneath him. He will be loved by Chelsea fans and most journalists who you feel would gladly debase themselves before him while performing a degrading act upon his person, small though that may be.
Jose is a winner you see, whereas poor old skinflint Arsene is a serial loser. Now, there’s an article in there somewhere.
I love the English summertime.
Written by Adam
Nice post Adam… so you are a fishing expert too 😀 A man of many talents.
I can’t wait for your post on ‘the special one’
Morning all btw,
Ginter is a very good mobile player, in fact I could say he is a better footballer than Sven Bender but maybe lacks the experience of playing at the top level. Ginter played 23 times and scored 2 goals so…
And he is better than Kruse in that time imho…
SC Freiburg finished 5th last season so it is not too bad a team… They nearly tipped Schalke to the last CL spot. They play a similar system to ours and he is one of their key force.
Smooooooth Adam…..loved it!!
Good morning all.
Hiya Ginge!
Be one to watch then Ts this german fella…? plus the money is about right lol
Great post Adam…..
Morning you lot.
Along with Wiper Blades, I sell tow ropes as well , if anyone feels like hanging themselves.
i hate the silly season…..but always happy to see ure post…p.s every1 on newsnow arsenals wathcing the clip of BFG skinning drogba…..which game was that exactly
Just from this paragraph………I knew it was Adam……………
……As the days grow longer, the Sun warms the earth and the seasons change, we find ourselves once again in the English Summertime. Deep underground all sorts of slimy creatures are looking to make their way to the surface so they can feast on the bounty that this time of year provides. Creepy-crawlies, some with multitudinous legs and some, called Jose, that make their way by squirming side to side on their elongated bellies are all competing for sustenance. Nematodes, Centipedes, Beetles, Slugs and all manner of insect life are active at this time of year. All looking to scavenge what they can from their surroundings.
Incredible mate. Poetic prose. Music to my eyes and ears and nutrition to my brain.
Phew man. If I tell you it is a great post I would be underestimating your writing.
Well done once again. You should write more. For a non-philosophical homo sapiens that was a wonderful piece of work.
Good Morning Lady and Gentlemen.
Off to read that again. 🙂
Morning all,
Now that’s what i call a post, well done Adam sounds like the third or forth wife has educated you well, 🙂
Posts like this well written one should be appreciated, it makes your brain step up a gear, for me i see it as an education as i don’t know what many of the words mean, It brings in to play Human error from so called Pundits it teaches us about the wildlife under ground and above all it shows us how low that snake in the grass Maureen will go sacked as a wimping little money grabber sulking away with his arse kicked and when the dust settles he crawls right back in to the premier league licking the boss or owners arse. He is a despicable snail he will have all those tossers at Fleet street in the palm of his hand while a genuine workaholic like Wenger will get flack of the highest degree. But Hey were Gooners were used to shit like that from everybody. And we know that Wenger wont be crawling away on his belly anytime soon. Adam i commend that forth wife well done son. 🙂
I’ve said it before, should you decide to change your chosen profession from international playboy/lothario I think this writing lark might suit you! Brudder Adam, praise the lord!
There you go……….even Steve agrees with me. 🙂
Pogba and Gintner make sense. much more than Capoue. For the simple reason that they are much younger, want to prove themselves and can be moulded. But I would not find it surprisin if AW bought Capoue and puts him in the defence (to spite Jose for buying a player we were never in the running for…Jovetic). If AW buys them both that would mean no Cesc maybe since he would move Arteta further up field to play as the AM with Cazorla and Theo beside him.
That would free up Diaby for a free transfer. 😆
Nice read..
But why German kid and not just James McCarthy?
Good Morning to the Lady of the House and all fellow Gooners in residence.
Before commenting on Adam’a article, I will say it has prompted the following.
Rico – Thank you for all your efforts in keeping the House open for rational, and yes at times heated, discussion; for setting and maintaining a set of reasonable standards for your posters and maintaining a level of integrity so obviously missing in many of your competitor’s websites.
Great post Adam. One of the best I have read, anywhere, for some time. I love the analogies, they were blindingly accurate and made me chuckle! That’s the sort of thing we need to read, provocative, light hearted and most importantly, right on the money. Excellent.
And your Mourinho description was the most accurate I have ever read.
Morning CG
“…and maintaining a level of integrity so obviously missing in many of your competitor’s websites”.
Nicely put.
Adam – Great article; a nice mix of humour, earthy truths and colourful imagery. I was trying to read it quickly so I could get to end of the article and check the byline. Also, I see we share some attitudes and opinions in regards to ‘The Special One’ Maureen Yo. Keep up the good work, a most enjoyable read.
Koscielny can leave if he wants…he is the reason why Arsenal is still to win a trophy after 8yrs….world class players or not if you go in to finals and make stupid horrendous school boys errors like he did it doesn’t matter how many world class players you sign you will not win any trophies..
He needs to shut his gob….and look within himself and see that he is a major reason why we haven’t …he like his other colleagues have been part of the problem!
Portsmouth Birmingham Liverpool etc have not had world class players and yet have won trohpies….we are tired of this world class player tripe …yes it helps but what about passion commitment doing your job properly etc..
Well said CG…
I think Mourinho may be concened after the recent revelations by Michael Douglas regarding the cause of his illness.After the way the special one areslicked Fegie I think a check up may be in order.
10:33…………. Classic Jay 😀
Hi Scott, WATH, Dev, Cg , Lee, Kj and all,
Dev what did you think of Valbuena and Gourchuff last night? Is Gourchuff finally over all his injuries? 😉
S2s I doubt Whelan will sell to us for even though we gave them Ryo and he got injured all season…
Maybe we do not offer enough when we bid for British passport holders 😉
Craszygunner
You make a good point about the players being responsible, absolutely. That is what I have been saying for some time, they are the ones not delivering or making mistakes. However, as Adam has described so eloquently, albeit in what may appear by some to be a foreign language, be careful about what you see and hear from these slimy invertebrates.
Ts, what you reckon on the David Alaba story as well…? Any thoughts or knowledge on him wanting to play central midfield hence he is thinking of leaving BM…? I reckon more utter rubbish but your more into the german footie than I am…!
Jay 10:33 🙂
Football journalists are are so thick, they probably think Cunnilingus is an Italian defender.
The transfer window should be ignored at the moment, but when the signings come get ready for the usual anguished primal scream.
craszyG – I wouldn’t read too much into Koscielny’s comments; at least until we have seen a full transcript of the interview. Many interviews are highly edited so the writer can spin the comments to support his/her own biases and opinions or to sensationalize the resulting article to increase the hits; just as detailed in Adam’s article above. Similar spin-doctoring has taken place with Sagna’s comments regarding his negotiations to extend his contract.
Kevin KJ – So few of the persons that write football stories are true journalists. Most wouldn’t recognise ‘journalistic integrity’ if it kicked them in the groin. Unfortunately most are just lazy lying hacks who regurgitate and recyle someone else’s delusions, dreams, fantasies &/or lies; anything to generate column inches and sell ‘product’. Truth seems to be their first victim of these fiction merchants and spin-doctors.
I have no doubt that Koscielny’s comments have been twisted a bit..or perhaps misled in to openning his mouth…but don’t forget Bayern and a few clubs are lurking so agents and other slimy journalist are out to make some mischief…but there is no doubt he said so…
Arsene, Looking for a DM, look no further than Chelsea’s David Luiz 6’2 26 years old and apparently out of favour with his new Manager. He would fit in nicely and be worth whatever..
Morning chaps and thanks for the kind words. They mean a lot to me.
CG is right, Crazy, you should take notice.
I did see the questions asked, and the release is so far out of context, it is laughable.
Good morning all
Adam on top form.
All these players we’re linked to are a yes for me, but we can only register 25 for CL..
So are we gonna get 55 extra butlins holiday campers to play in. Our next gen, reserves,U21,U18,U15….??
Or are some of the existing rubbish going to become more versatile, to justify their salary? ie Santos work in the burger section, Bendtner clean Gervinho’s boots so he doesn’t tackle himself and dribble into Theo in the right corner of the pitch??
As for that wet Sardine , I would love to see how he will handle Hazard when another ball boy holds on to a football too long, or when his old players get slower…
Besides, Diaby will be like a new signing, in January for about a week….
SP, i’d give that a go as well mate but seems Luiz fancies Barca or Madrid…! Added to that fact in an Arsenal shirt Luiz would miss half the season suspended with the red cards he’d get..!
Adam, i would describe it as eloquent 🙂
And to add to that SP Arsene was the one who told Rafa that if he had Luiz he’d play him as a DM. Good free kick taker as well. But my issue with him is he gets caught on the ball too often. Not enough calm to my liking.
@tsgh:
I guess so. But this year we should ask for him and give them Ryo, Tom and still if he wants more than Serge too. Nice bargain it would be won’t it? We can help them get back up and personally I’d rather have Wigan then any other club.
Btw guys what do you think if Arsenal go out and buy their neighbors Watford? You think we should do that to have our own ‘B’team? And does anyone know if Prem rules would allow it.
He’d still play more games than Diaby Wath 🙂
Not a player in our team that doesn’t get caught out S2S but this guy would make all the difference.
They would earn about the same kind of money as well SP 😀 better still get rid of Diaby pay Luiz the extra dosh..!
Who would also take a gamble on Torres for 15 million..?
AGAG is not allowed to answer the above question for obvious reasons….!
Scott – Do you have a link for the complete interview with Koscielny? All of the articles I’ve read all refer back to the same highly edited version.
Not for me Wath. not even for 5 mil more action out of Gerve
Your a hard man to please SP, Think those fish have made you all grumpy mate 😉
I think Torres just been ruined at the Chavs…! He could be a machine for us..! I reckon he would score us a bucket load…!
Cheers Scottie. 🙂
I’d have Torres over Gerwanko in a heartbeat… in fact i’d have WATH over the klingon!!
CG, i am sorry mate, but i saw it among the plethora of things i have read over the last few days.
I actually read it before i read the “official release”.
It all just made sense.
I thought absolutely nothing of it until hours and hours later when reading Gooners around the world taking potshots at Kozzer.
If i do come across it i will certainly post it.
Incredible what a few words left out, question marks etc, etc can do do a mans words.
Wonder why so many sportsman around the world ban interviews.
Thanx Lee, cheeky cnut…. I was better than Gerv when I had a broken ankle…! I’ll still be better than him when I am 45….!
CG… a mate just sent me these which are a few lf the questions asked of Kozzer……..
Regarding your future, where will you play next season?’
– ‘Isn’t it gruelling to go through season after season without winning trophies? What could incite you to leave?’
– ‘PSG are on your case, have they been in touch?’
Fill in the spaces 🙂 🙂 🙂
WATH, Agag and Rico will surely comment on the corporal attributes rather than tactical/technical and goalscoring prowess of Torres. I for one would like to see him at AFC given the lone striker’s role. That is if Rooney does not come, in which case I would prefer Shrek to Torres. Torres has been ruined by the chavs for one simple reason……….they play direct football which borders on the physical…..a sort of refined SRFC methodology. At AFC Torres would play the short passing style which brings forward his technical attributes. It is while on goalscoring duties that his thighs will emerge to the fore.
Thanks Scott.
I am with you Dev, the bloke was class at the dippers you don’t just become a crap player…! tactics have played a huge role in why his game has suffered and they do not play to his strengths…! I think he would fit in very nicely with us…! I’d have him and luiz in the blink of an eye if i was honest…!
At the moment the Arsenal wage bill is £143 million. That means next season Arsenal will not go up above £148.7 million in wages according to FFP rules.
The amount of money Roman has pissed away on players is staggering.
Imagine he actually had a clue and bought wisely??
Scary thought.
Similar to what the arabs are doing at Shitty Scott, the money they just spent is actually piss funny when put into context… would anyone here be happy with 50bar on the two players they have just bought…?
No thanx, not me…!
Imagine if AW was one of the world’s richest billionaires.
Scary thought.
Good Morning Rico, WATH Adam Ts dg Scott Stevep S2S CG Lee Jay George Kevin Potter and to all those reading in the background.
One of Adam masterpieces. Who else can it be… until I got the Bleacher Report and Mourinho, well, no other than Adam.
C.G and Scott , I don’t know if this will help , Iam not French fluent but perhaps someone here is . I don’t trust googletranslate or the like.
.http://www.eurosport.fr/football/match-amical/2012-2013/laurent-koscielny-avant-uruguay-france-et-bresil-france-je-prefere-les-petits-techniques_sto3787751/story.shtml
If AW was one of the worlds richest billionaires, chances are he would change his name by deed poll to Silent Stan.
DG
Good comments regarding Torres, who is a far better finisher than the over rated Rooney. He would be a perfect fit for the reasons you mention.
Personally, I detest Rooney with a passion.
I do not ever want to see that Northern, chain smoking, over-hyped, over weight Chav in an Arsenal shirt. Nor do I want to hear the commentators ejaculate every time he gets the ball or witness the press writing love letters about his average performances. He is not what he is made up to be.
AND I will never forgive the cheat for that shocking dive which helped end the glorious Invincibles run, or the part he played in a game ruined by a number of extremely dodgy decisions, harassing of match officials and poor tackles.
Torres is a fair shout but I do not see it happening DG.
If AW was one of the world’s richest billionaires ‘Project Youth’ will prosper.
Thanks Potter…hopefully someone can help…
If AW was a righ billionaire I feel that he would add Enterpises after his name so that his initials would be AWE. 😆
rich not righ
DG – After he becomes A.W.E. he will go into partnership with M. Shock so it can be Shock & AWE.
CG………good one. I like.
This article should pleas some on here today.
“Marseille have contacted Arsenal’s Gervinho, all sides happy for move to happen”
http://sportwitness.ning.com/forum/topics/marseille-have-contacted-arsenal-s-gervinho-and-all-sides-are-hap
Deadline day for season tickets tomorrow guys ,thought we would have actually signed someone tasty rather than this rumour mill spinning like crazy.By the way where did the Torres rumour come from?.
We would be shocked and awed if they then spent any money on decent players 😉
That should be please, but I’m sure some here wish their pleas are heard and the deal is completed.
No Torres rumour Jay just me throwing it out there seeing as it seems if certain drunken journo’s are to be believed that Moreenyo wants rid of him and the chavs will sell him the the cheap…. I just wondered who on here would like him at the Arsenal.
Well said Kevin 12.19,totally agree ,considering we have enough pikeys living in London.
WATh he has never seemed happy with the Chavs,I would take him tomorrow ,I think he would revert to his old scary self in the famous red and whie shirt.
Those are my feelings as well Jay, the bloke was pure quality, you don’t just lose that, he looks like he’s Roman’s play thing and as you say never looks happy there. He needs to enjoy his football and I reckon he’d score us a bucket load.
No chance that Wenger will sign Rooney. The link is all in the hope that it will encourage season book renewals. Usual Arsenal ploy.
On Thu, Jun 6, 2013 at 9:38 AM, Highbury House
W.A.T.H
Form is temporary, class is permanent and that sums up Torres to a tee. These players need confidence. Timing and decision making goes out of the window without it – and he would get that at Arsenal. Chelsea (Fordstam), must be a horrid place when things aren’t all rosy, as the Russian cares not one jot about decency or doing the right thing. Horrid club, Rooney would do well there.
Jolly good show Adam, there’s a lot going on under the surface that we’ll never know about, all we can do is keep scratching away.
As for those penis enlargement procedures they don’t work btw.
Unlike a lot it seems KKJ i hate Rooney as a person but would love him in an Arsenal shirt…! I also think he would thrive and be great for us….
Torres loves to play in red, huge mistake joining the chavs but then again would any of us turn down that kind of money, def not but time for him to now enjoy his footie, Come North Mr Torres we’ll soon bring that spark back..!
Martin
“No chance that Wenger will sign Rooney.”
Good, lets hope you are right.
Micko stay off the black stuff it keeps distorting your eyesight mate 😉
Micko. I will take your word for that mate. 🙂
Rooney’s ok. He gave me a great price on some asphalt he had left over.
Hope you didn’t put it on your roses Adam…..!
Chelski are in for the Hulk,they do love a big name dont they,we wil propably get Mr Bean.
Adam 1.44 LOL be careful his brother dont nick it back later
Nice to see that FFP is biting so hard.
Hi there NG,… how all is well?
WATH, apologies… I can’t even get a chance in the office to break wind’ lol… too busy its affecting what I should be doing i.e blogging on HH 😀
Now, on Alaba I haven’t seen play DM so I have no idea but he is a very good play and AW is akin to left footers playing as the DM or the no.6 if you like…
I always thought Gustavo was the one we would be going for as he would want to play more often in order to get into the Brazillian national team starting 11… since MArtinez established himself as the box to box midfielder for the Bavarians, Luiz Gustavo has not featured much…
Alaba is skilful but very left footed so I wonder how he will fair as a DM midfielder? He is not as mobile as Gustavo imo….
W.A.T.H
I will happily carry Torres all the way from Chelsea to the Ems, on my back. In fact, I would let him sleep with my wife, if that would get him to sign. Strike that, even I have to have the light off nowadays!
Rooney I would happily run over and then reverse, just to make sure. He reminds me of Cashley. Its all about him. Remember how he disrespected Moyes by writing lies, after all he had done for him, which lead to Moyes suing him. Plus the timing of his transfer requests, the last one to overshadow red noses retirement. That sums him up.
I think it would be a mistake and he would prove a negative influence. I guess the fact that fans are now positive about him, is a reflection of how desperate some are for a big signing.
Torres would score a boatload in a red shirt.
Latest news on Sky.
A lorry load of Viagara has just been hijacked in North London. A police spokesman claimed they are looking for three hardened criminals.
Don’t you think Alaba is more physical than Gustavo though Ts..? plus he’s a lot younger and still learning..!
Well I don’t see if that way KKJ, I can always bottom line see a quality player and however much a dislike a player i would not cut my nose to spite my face to see him play for us…!
It seems the transfer info on Rooney isn’t true at all and seems to be rednose softening the blow for the mancs selling Rooney so Moyes don’t get the blame…! If we not going to beleive media drivel on Arsenal then we should appreciate most of the rest is all made up as well.
As said i think the bloke is an arse BUT he’s also a great footballer and why would I not want a great player in an Arsenal shirt…?
Back to why we all have differing opinions though…!
Drogba, Gerrard, Lampard, Scholes all players I can’t stand and never did but I would of loved them to play for Arsenal.
He’s younger definitely than Luiz, WATH… but I think Gustavo has/use to have more pace and defending skills than Alaba… but Alaba like Martinez is much better on the ball so it depends on what we are looking for or what AW is looking for?
Personally, I think Arsenal fans what a Papa Diouf as a DM but those type of players can not put 2 passes together. Its like M Sissoko of Liverpool in 2005 where he was a terrier but his passing was disastrous…
Personally, I think that is the reason why players like Makele were never rated in france or Spain but valued by Jose and English fans…
evening all – seems i shot my mouth off to early over Higuiain – damn – we’re nowhere on this one either it seems
A fired up Rooney with a point to prove – yes please but you get the sense he’s way out of Wenger’s budget bucket league – rumour has it no one is allowed to out earn Wenger so at least we know the peak and Rooney is over that
WATH
Have to agree to disagree on Shrek. I admit it is a personal thing with me, he is the one player I really dislike.
Now Drogba and Scholes I would have loved to see in an Arsenal shirt, proper players even though they had a side to them.
I always thought a lively little player like Defoe would have scored loads for us with the amount of chances we create and routinely miss. None of our current strikers are going to be prolific, hence why I took your kind offer for Torres! Jovetic isn’t that player, Higuain possibly and Villa definitely knows where the goal is. Torres is the one for me from that lot.
We will only know when the deal is done, you rarely get anything via Arsenal.
So it seems AW woulld sign a new contract…….more reasons for me to stop wathing the EPL
Trying to find the John Cross article….anyone got it?
KKJ, Defoe is an Arsenal fan as well, also think he would of been good for us but for some reason he seems happy with what he has, lack of ambition…?
Torres I’d take all day long and so too Rooney, Higuain knows where the goal is but is he quick enough for the Prem? I’d also take Benteke as well….!
Yilmaz for me as well as also a bit of a lump but def knows where the goal is..!
How about we sign Darren Bent on a free, keep getting rid of the rubbish and lower the season ticket prices??
While we have Silent Stan , 4th is a trophy which every year we seem to scrape , even with high profile departures and a pony team.
If we keep the core of British players , we should have enough for 4th again.
It’s not like the national team pick our young lions, Walcott, Wilshere and Ox aside.
We have Gibbs and Jenks which will be overlooked, meaning on the flanks defensively we’ll be ok, should Nacho get injured or Bac follow the Arab cash
What one Lee…?
This one http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/football/news/arsenal-chief-exec-hints-arsene-1935843
Thanks pal…twitter on fire with it! Rewarding failure…blah blah blah!
Check ya email Lee… 1 on it’s way..!
Cheers matey!
thanks for a great post. well written fun to read. and totally agree with the ruminations also. AW has said in the past that he believes he can buy younger talent and improve them by 20% than older, more proven, players at top price and they improve by only a few percent. I am sure if the right talent was available who could step in and produce the way he hopes it might be a different story. but AW has personally and at other clubs its been seen a great deal of money spent on the certainty that flops ie, Carroll and Torres.
Of course we watched AVP win the prem for Manure but AW would argue that’s the exception and not the rule.
I’d like to think the Alaba rumor has some legs, versatiity is an AW transfer trait and it is the one rumor today, I’d like to see come to fruition immediately.
RVP not AVP
Afternoon All,
Great read as always adam.
Old Maureen,
he says..no need for new signings,
I will improve what we have..that is what I do.
Next day,he wants 4 players.
Lying little git.
We all know that the season ticket spin is on full trottle,
but I have lost count of the players we are gunner buy,
anyone been counting.
So exciting ein..it.
I’m so excited I could crush a grape or even jump over a doll’s house!
Welcome goonamerica, Lets hope this summer he buys the finished article just to finish the team off into the finished article that can compete for trophies..!
Booooooo!! Hello, all!!
Adam, I could instantly tell it was you. 🙂 🙂 Wonderful read, as always. And I had to google nematodes. 😛
And did anyone mention Torres??? I would have him in half a heartbeat. 😳
frednerk
Adam describes Maureen perfectly. He left Fordstam, oops Chelsea, last time because Abramovich was fed up with his demands for more cash. He is a flat track bully, splashing someone elses money and is managing a club with the same moral compass as he has. The press in Spain sussed him out – unfortunately our press will be blowing him at every opportunity and telling us how great he is.
Ak knows all about full trottle in that cab of his!
Anyway all this talk about ‘soopa signings’ lot of baloney, whole bag of mashings is boll…. And cra….? I don’t think many, if any of the players that have been ‘linked’ to the club are in the frame of Le Chef’s wanted list, except Vain, and he won’t be signing for us, as control freak Moyes won’t let him. Moyes has old scores to settle with Shrek and I think a bit of ritual himiliation will be served up before old plastic hair is moved on. Xmas, maybe, but not before Mr Moyes has extracted his pound of flesh, and laid it on the plate, knife and fork at the ready!
Bah, humbug! We shall all have wait and see what is released on the official web site on July 1st because we will know nothing until the announcements are made of who our new soopa stars are………..or not!
Well written piece Adam, as usual. Prosaic to say the least! Amusing, witty and with more than a morsel of truth contained within your florid style. A most enjoyable read! Thanks.
Hi agag,
Yes, we were talking about Torres but we don’t fancy him in the way you do…………
Nematode is a brilliant word. Adam must have swallowed Rogets Thesaurus (if it still exists) before putting pen to paper! I loved his reference to tickling sheaths, made me chuckle, if you know what I mean 🙂
KJ,
Had enough of the chavs telling me how great the little,
pri-k is.
Love to see wenger,Poke him in the Eye
hello agag…you getting all flustered with the torres schpeel lol..
Wavy, your right about Moyes and shrek @4.27 , he will destroy him then flog him abroad
There you go ladies and gents, Arsenals big summer signing. Oh and they will break the wage structure to land him….. yaaaay..
http://www.football365.com/news/21554/8760140/Arsenal-Want-Wenger-For-The-Long-Term
I like Torres for purely footballing reasons, KJ. He scores beautiful goals, match-winning ones. He is a pleasure to watch and we already know he lloks good in red. 😳
Adam’s grammar is alwaaaaays impeccable. 🙂 He always tells great stories.
George, it also seems as though Torres’ injury record has improved. AW, go get him. 🙂
ilovemyself won’t sell him to us agag
Frednerk, yes the blokes a tool, juts like that plastic little club.
£900 million debt transferred to Abramovich’s company and now they are claiming Chelsea is in profit for the first time. They think we are all mugs and the media are as thick as two short planks.
A bit late coming on today, had a right mish-mash of a day.
Got a couple of interesting emails from Lee, including one of an absolutely gorgeous looking women. She was an angel, literally…
Anyway today’s post was interesting, with some NewsNow rumours via Rico…
And then the mood darkened…
The writing took on far more vitriolic feel…
Objects of derision from the writers pen were surgically sliced apart…
I recognised the style, it could only come from one individuals quill…
HH’s own resident wordsmith, Grade A…
Great post Adam, thoroughly enjoyed it…
And yes, Mourinho is a tiny turd isn’t he?!
Afternoon Gooners/Rico btw…
Arsenal chief executive Ivan Gazidis has confirmed he wants Arsene Wenger to sign a new deal and stay at the club for the “long term”.
So if wenger says,
I may renew my contract,next year,
but then again I may not.
Why would we give him 70million to spend.
I hope Mourinho decides that Torres is not in his plans and sells him on the cheap. Haha. A girl can dream.
Mourinho is yuck. So much at his disposal in Madrid, and yet again, he lets his ego get in the way.
Boo, Kev!! How’s driving? And shopping?
Well after such a great post – I am sacking myself…
Evening all…..
Can’t do that, rico. You’re stuck with us. 😛 Howdy??
I think that’s the other way around agag 😉
All fab thanks, you??
No. You can’t do that Rico. You are very dear to us all.
Thanks Agag. Very sweet and kind.
“I am sacking myself…”
Rico, I wouldn’t worry, your job is safe.
You see, we don’t all have two hours to spare each day translating Adams verbalige. I am sure some on here were running it through Google translate or reaching for the thesaurus.
It was a blinding post and he nailed Maureen and the gutter press perfectly. Not sure about the tickling sheaths and penis enlargement, put those two together and they seem to contradict each other… 🙂
Whats this about Fab rico??
Do you have inside information?!
😆 Adam….
I’m not so sure Kj 😉
Sorry Esp, I don’t have any…..
I quite like the link to Steven Taylor – always liked him, good British no nonsense defender….
Rico. Personally I cannot bear Taylor. But he loves himself so much that he doesn’t care about my lack of affection for him.
He also wears jackets and suits with truly bizarre design features. It’s not so much that I don’t like him, more that I despise him. 🙂
Apart from all that Adam, he’s a good defender 😉
I will have to take your word for that Rico. 🙂
I do remember him elbowing Arshavin in the head off the field. I don’t see him in an Arsenal shirt myself but I am wrong more than right these days, hence my awful record of failed marriages.
Back again at home and at home……if you get my gist.
So you are a wordsmith Adam!!!! Good to hear about that. You said that you might be more wrong than right these days but that might also be a wrong assumption. 😉
You will Adam 😉
Have seen your mail Devil and passed on your request 😛
Crikey. Just read that Laudrup is going to walk out on Swansea….
Adam, have you ever thought about a career change?
A Mediator perhaps??
All that experience could be put to good use. 😉
Worst traffic jams in London, for years today.
Blimey Rico, that’s a bit of a shock.
That traffic jam is probably down to all the new signings trying to get to London Colney for a medical Ak 😉
Hiya Taxi-Fiver. how are you habib???
By any chance haven’t you come across a passenger who has thrown some rays of light on the cobweb filled corridors bunkering Lord Arsene’s stronghold?
Need to eat now. Back shortly…
Just watched Spain’s u21 side. That Isco would be worth spending a few pounds on.
Ak, traffic probably due to all the secret service agents from across the developed world and their cronies ‘reconning’ for Bilderberg 2013
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2013/jun/06/bilderberg-2013-delegates-arrive-secretive-summit
Arsène Wenger believes Ryo Miyaichi has plenty of potential to become a top player for Arsenal in seasons to come… that is our winger sorted then 😉
JM should be crossed Fernandinho has moved to $hitty… 334M for a 28 y.o who has not played in any major league???
£34M I meant…
How many games did Javi Garcia play last season for $hiity? And we slate AW for deadwoods
Shouldn’t he be busy ruining another football club?
http://www.london24.com/sport/arsenal/redknapp_believes_arsenal_side_is_poorest_in_years_and_backs_spurs_to_claim_fourth_if_improvement_not_forthcoming_1_2226408
As I said yesterday after the under 21 game, ESP…….until dinosaurs such as Poolis, Allardyce, Hughes etc continue to pollute the EPL, English players will never reach a good level of football.
I forgot to include Redknapp in that cathegory.
lol
poor guy!!!!!
Esp, I strongly suspect Isco will be a City player real soon….
Rico………Isco has a problem. It is called Reyesitis, another word for homesickness.
Redknapp is a plank, all he has done is say just how s***e the Totts must have been not to have got 4th….
He’ll follow Pellgrani (spelling) I am sure Devil… how long he stays though, after your comment. is open for debate 😉
I also think the coaching a youth level really needs to Improve in England, kids need to be taught at a young age how to really play football. To get it down on the ground and pass it around. The Spanish model really needs to be emulated.
I know people like to pride english football as been a man’s version, tough and unforgiving in the tackle. But football has really evolved away from that, and its no coincidence that Spain have dominated International football the last few years, they are a great footballing team, just like France in the late 90s and just like Germany are now.
I would also like to see a change in attitude towards football in my own country too.
Anyone watching Germany play the Netherlands? Our boy Ginter is player CD. I also wonder if the Netherlands coach is related to Pol…
Whats this I hear about Cesc meeting up with Darren Dein? That could only be bad news for us.
It was meant to be Navas who suffered from homesickness…
Dev do you think Navas and Isco will work at $hitty?
You may be right Rico, its been 24 hours without a major signing at City. I’m sure their fans will take to the streets in protest soon!
If we were to sell Podi I wouldn’t mind seeing Isco replace him! But seeing as he would cost more than 12m he is well out of Arsenal’s reach.
What, no Gervinho goals in this table????? The one he scored against Norwich was a class on its own.
Esp… the original FA rules on football which was published 100 years ago did not allow physical challenges…
I am surprise Kruse has made it to the senior team though…
I like Fer and De Jong of Netherlands
There is another problem with Isco and Navas. would they fancy a trip to Stoke or Sunderland on an icy evening? With hard ground. with the wind blowing the ball all over the place.
They went into hiding everytime they faced Barca and Real.
I cant see Maher playing? Is he playing Esp?
I have no problem with physical tackles as long as the player making them can play football and is not there for the sole purpose of being a bruiser!
I remember playing a youth level being a smaller technical player I was kicked black and blue every sunday, and that was how football was played here, still is.
I think he is tsgh!
He has in fact, just scored!
yes he is…….just scored the first goal ginge.
Makes me laugh Esp. The TW doesn’t open until July 1st, but City are buying buying and buying. Yet they have no manager…
Very unlike the owners to sign players, before they left it to the manager….
Thats true Rico, I wonder if Pellegrini has been speaking to them.
2-0 to the Dutch!
Yet again this transfer window feels like groundhogs day..
wiynaldum has made it 2-0
wow the Dutch being ruthless for a change
De Jong is class…
Serge is in the u-20 world cup squad
Esp, we have to be patient and believe that something is going on. We don’t have the kind of money that the Mancs have to just buy buy and buy. What we need and how much we have to spend is very different to them….
I truly believe that we’ll get a couple of class players, and 2/3 to make us deeper/stronger…
Group B u-21 group of death or what?
Spain
Germany
Netherlands
Russia
Dev, I am suspecting Laudrup is being tapped up by $hitty…
Very true Lady Rico, we fans panic sometimes, Navas’s stats are worse than Gerv…. is he better than Frank Sinclair? Hell No! I am sure Dev will agree with that… apart from Fernandinho, none of the buys by any team makes them stronger…
Do you expect 2-3 palyers over 15m Rico?
Anyone think Gerv will be shown the door so soon into his Arsenal stay?
oyyyy mates.
while you lot are busy watching the under 21 ARSENAL LADIES are trouncing 😉 the chavs ladies 1-0.
And Malta under 21 are holding the MIGHTY POLES 😆 0-0 and for a change we have given more shots than them after 40 minutes.
Malta u-21? 😀 Nice one…
Good for the Arsenal ladies…
Strootman has not still made it to the senior team full time yet?
That is why I said he is not worth the touted £15M asking price…
wow……….we made it to half time 0-0. And we have managed the same amount of shots equal to them. That is progress.
I’m offski folks..
Have a good evening/night…
‘Til tomorrow….
Night all….
Arsene Wenger has added Steven Taylor to his summer wish-list according to the Daily Mail as the Arsenal boss plans to strengthen his defence this summer.
Taylor could be tempted by a potential move to the Emirates Stadium given the arrival of Mapou Yanga-Mbiwa could limit his chances of a guaranteed spot in Alan Pardew’s starting eleven but one would imagine a lot could depend on whether the Magpies keep hold of captain Fabricio Coloccini, with speculation rife that the Argentine is keen on a move back to his homeland.
At this rate we are going to have AFC, Arsenal B, Arsenal C…..Arsenal Z
Sod the traffic jams…
On my 2nd pint of Peroni….
Rock on Rico, break out the Cava and pay up that Fiver.. 😉
Good night lady.
cu tomorrow.
I am off too.
Gd nite my friends.
Germany are all over the cloggy’s in the second half…..
AK you be careful with that Peroni….it’s a creeper!
Morning boys and girls.
I hear we have activated the release clause for Fellaini?
Anyone??
Scott can’t say I have heard that!
If you’re taking about the big announcement in the next 48 hours.. its that Wenger is signing a new contract..
No Paul…..what i heard was pretty specific, but who knows lol
I’ve read about it on NewNow, we’ll have to wait and see I guess.
Fellaini would be a good start to the transfer dealings this summer.
Fellaini?
Sky bet has slashed the odds to 11/10 for Fellaini
Cheers Lee, I know what you mean mate…
Roll on June 10th…
What’s happening on the 10th Kev?
Yes, Fellaini Adam. He would be a game changer and he is already in the EPL, and no need for adjustment. He would bring something to the table by making us stronger in the M-field.
Ginge, I would be happy to see Miyaichi more involved with our 1st team next season.
He could be quite a threat coming off of the bench, in Wenger’s favourite 70th minute substitution against a tiring opponant…
Hi Kev and Adam
Adam, the odds on him joining us have been slashed after some big bets were placed.
Tayyebs Adam, well I thought it was, have I got it wrong?
I really cannot see Arsenal getting Fellaini…
If he leaves Everton, i’m sure he’ll go to ManUre.
Hi Nasher, i’m on the night shift tonight…
Did Bellerin play for Spain?
Maybe the guy is sick and tired with Moya… who knows.
I didn’t watched the game. Still around Strafford???
Morning Scott, I really don’t believe any of that Fellaini stuff.
For a start, Arsenal are too tight to pay the fee.
Pure gossip Scott don’t crack the beers open just yet…!
Although AK working an all nighter cos he driving Fellaini to Colney for his medical in the wee dark hours….
Night all….! Drive careful Kev.
Please AW surprise Kev; show him you’re not a tight arse as some think.
Bellerin played for the U-19s I believe, he isn’t in the u21 squad.
Cheers Wath. An all-nighter in the Alleyns Head.
Night Nash and all…
Take it easy Kev and all…t’morrow is another.
Will Everton want to lose their manager AND best player to Utd though guys??
Feillani is Utd bound….with or without Moyes.( can’t see him lasting too long at manure tbh) Scott.
We won’t be signing big , especially from the premier league.
I expect 1/2 from the championship,a u21 French prospect and an unknown African teenager ….oh and the 3 high profile sales to balance the purchases of the overpriced championship players (prob from Wigan,qpr and reading) and the few million on the starlet and African.
We will probably land a freebie too, likely Schwarzer.
I could not disagree more George, bit time will tell.
Afternoon Scott, yeah the Fellaini rumours are all over the media here….be happy with him and Shrek I suppose! Shrek is a tool of a human being, but a great footballer and he’d score buckets of goals for us…
Morning chaps. Gazidis has been giving it the big ‘un about our mighty financial clout. He would look pretty stupid if a big signing didn’t follow.
Nothing new there then.
Morning Adam, our resident wordsmith…it seems the world class signings are about to flow!
Sideshow bob and Shrek for starters….
You’re still available for the HHCC meeting on 10th?
“Stupider”
I am Lee.
Alls good then….
As long as Kev and Rocky are there it will be an excellent evening I think.
Fellani it is then 🙂
Morning Lee, Adam, Scott, George and all…
Morning Rico.
Hello everyone.
Rumours that are really flying atm….Rooney, Fellaini and Pogba.
Fabregas still getting a mention.
Exciting time of year.
Pain in the arse tme lf year 🙂
With all this new found wealth I can’t help but feel sorry for Tuesday Sunday….I think he thought he was a done deal!
It’s no good, I have to ask Lee.. Who? 😉
Some dude we were linked to a while ago….not 100% sure if that’s his real name though! 😉
😆
Brudder Lee. 🙂
It’s been a bad week for Stuart Pearce.
England U21 were show up a second-rate against Italy in their opening match of Euro Under-21s in Israel, and following the defeat plenty of dissenters have begun tearing strips of off Psycho.
Pearce’s football acumen is now under the microscope, and in that regard an article from 1995 has been dredged up in which the current England U21 gaffer claimed that Arsenal’s decision to buy Denis Bergkamp would prove to be a waste of money.
The epic quotes from the 1995 article in the Sun read:
Pearce said “Bergkamp struggled with Inter Milan. He made no impression, so the guy is not trying a different country in the hope of rediscovering the form he had in Holland. But there is no way it is going to happen overnight for Bergkamp even though the argument that English soccer might suit him better, perhaps carries some weight.
“I would have taken Stan Collymore ahead of Bergkamp, even for £1million more. Liverpool have got a better deal than Arsenal. Buying Platt and Bergkamp at the same time is a massive gamble on Arsenal’s part, I’m not convinced it will pay off.”
So, how did that prediction play out?!
Shows what a great judge he is….
Brudder Lee Love…
Few people in this country bear a sharper resemblance to a sheet of taupe Formica than Pearce. An Amoeba of a man.
Collymore could have given you a detailed tour of Britain’s best car parks though. And cleaned your windscreen with a body fluid.
New post up…